Speech to Text short story. Dictated, not read – into the microphone on my computer.
THE RICH WOMAN & THE BIG HOOVER
So once upon a time there was this person who liked nothing more than climbing inside of vacuum cleaners and she would climb inside and she’d try her best to stay in there for long periods of time but unfortunately the maid was coming because she was rich she had a maid.
The woman had a really important job and but she was sneaking and maid don’t know that she worked from home and was rich and told them and that she had to go into work that day and actually she just hid inside the hoover it’s quite big as well as I its industrial one that she had made the bait she had made the maid get a big hoover from here is from there um Warehouse and say this woman hides in the Hoover and she’s sitting there for hours and she doesn’t know what to do but she watches the maid and the maid is doing and turns out that the maid is actually eating all of her sausages that she keeps in the fridge and the woman by the time she stays in the Hoover till the maid goes home and then she gets out Hoover and she told her to be there so she doesn’t have a shower and then after the shower she found her husband tell husband what happened at the maid isn’t doing her job and instead to eating all of the sausages the maid is due to come the next day as well so the woman again tell them maybe she will be working 9 to 5 that day as she climbs into the Hoover and she Waits for ever and when the maid gets here she tries to do the hoover but she can’t shift the hoover because it’s too heavy and have because it’s so heavy she thinks that maybe the Hoover’s all full of dead mice that has crawled in there and died. That’s something that happens to old hoovers over time that mice are climbing make their homes become asphyxiated and I say she takes the hoover to the furnace that cleaners have access to at the warehouse and she tossed the hoover into the furnace and it burns and Burns and Burns and the rich woman dies in the hoover in the furnace.
Next day husband gets up and he looks like he can’t find his wife anywhere and the maid turns out to be in the kitchen cooking sausages and husband says do you know where my wife is and why you cooking sausages and she says you don’t need your wife anymore because you’ve got me and I’m really good at cooking sausages way better than she was cooking sausages wouldn’t you rather have me he said no. She said oh well she’s dead as well actually so it’s Me Or Nothing and the guys ok it’ll have to be that then.