I was sitting in a pub this evening. Here are some snippets of things I heard young and not so young men saying to each other around me. I present them here to you, not to make any sort of statement, or judgement – I do so only to preserve them in TEXT.
I’ve gone through a dry patch but now I’m ready you know?
Cor, I bet her pussy stinks dunnit?
I bet she’s got fifteen on the go ‘ent she?
You know there’s a line for the pool table yeah?
Mark absolutely shit-his-pants.
I want to know what she looks like before I start chucking her around to my mates.
Yeah, I know how to track people’s phones. They got chips now for ‘em. Yeah mate, he knows how to do it as well. We’ll sort it.
I need to sign on soon too as well. Puts dinner on the table don’t it?
Mate, how long are you gonna be on the pool table? It’s winner stays on you know.
Do you want a lime and soda, skinny bitch?
Oh fuck, they’re playing tennis in wheelchairs on the TV.
Is that the one that’s had the tricep taken out?
You’re teaching her how to play? That means you’re gonna be on it for ages init?
Where we going after this? Is it? You fink we’ll all get in? Over 25′s init?
This is driving me fucking mad you know.